Safety is the magic ingredient that allows the deepest inner healing to arise.
Being witnessed by another person as we explore our inner world is a great place to start. Many people have their first breakthrough when being held in that way. But the challenge is to create that level of holding for ourselves.
Becoming Your Own Safe Harbor
To live in genuine inner peace, we have to learn to create that safety from the inside.
For example, noticing you have a not-good-enough belief and then judging yourself for having that belief doesn’t create a shift; it just layers more judgment on top. I’ve seen this often, including in myself!
This practice is simply about offering yourself the steady, patient presence you needed as a child. It starts with small moments, catching yourself in the middle of a harsh inner judgment and pausing long enough to ask yourself, “Would I say this to someone I love?”
Something shifts when we stop abandoning ourselves in the hard moments. Our old patterns start to loosen. There’s room to breathe and pause before the habitual response kicks in.
Purpose Waits for Quiet
Limiting beliefs are loud, creating urgency and demanding attention. They’ve been with us so long that we mistake them for truth.
In my purpose work, many clients come to me because they have tried hard to uncover their purpose but were unable to find it. It’s often because their inner environment is too noisy and unsafe for the quieter wisdom to get through.
But purpose is patient. It waits for us to get quiet enough, safe enough, to hear it. When we do the work of creating that inner safety, purpose can be revealed.
Starting with a Small Practice
This week let yourself notice a moment when you treat yourself with less patience than you’d give to someone you love. A moment when you pile judgment on top of an already difficult feeling. A moment when you’re quick to dismiss your own needs or experience.
You don’t have to change anything yet. Just notice, and ask yourself, “What would it look like to bring the kindness I give others to this moment?”
This is where it starts. Not with a dramatic breakthrough, but with gentle curiosity and heartfelt compassion for yourself.